A Problem With Cupid's Arrows
by HowAboutThat
Summary: It's a regular day at the Mystery Shack until Cupid decides to shoot two people with his arrows, but one of them hits the wrong target. It goes from bad to worst leaving Grunkle Stan and Dipper to go after Mabel and save her. Semi-Dark, I guess. [I can say nothing more because then it'd spoil everything. I'd appreciate it if you reviewed. [Written before Tale of Two Stans]


HAT: It came to mind today (May 15) and I just _had_ to write it. Enjoy!

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls because if I did I'd make the art anime style.**

* * *

It was another regular Valentine's Dae-Day (the second Valentine's Day of the year for Gravity Falls) at the Mystery Shack. Stanford Pines is making Soos, Wendy, and his great niece and nephew set up for the day while he "supervises" the work. He's never been too fond about Valentine's Day, let alone Valentine's Dae-Daym but if it helps him make a profit, he's more than willing to go through with playing along for the sake of getting rich.

"Oh, man, this is sick!" Wendy says, stepping back and looking at her creation.

Stan looks over at a large Cupid and frowns. "I dunno, it's just a big baby in a diaper with a weapon."

She rolls her emerald eyes. "You don't see the artistic appease!"

"Whatever," he shrugs and notices a boy with medium length dark blond hair and brown eyes flirting with Mabel. _Welp, time to scare off guys again._ "Hey, kids! What's going on here?"

"Nothing,Grunkle Stan," Mabel assures.

Stan glances at his nephew and sees a minute shake of his head before putting his hand on the suitor's shoulder. "So, what're you plans? Wanna buy a snow globe? Keychain? T-shirt? You plan on marrying her?"

"Uh," the boy stutters, casting a desperate glance towards Mabel.

"Back off! We were just talking!"

"Can't stay if you don't by something," Stan shrugs.

"That's not fair!" Mabel insists.

Dipper smiles smugly and then the boy does something that neither Pines male expects and pulls out a wad of one dollar bills while stuttering, "I-I'll pay! How much for this bracelet?"

"Eighty dollars," grunts the silver haired man.

"Dude, leave Mabel and her guy alone," Wendy says, walking over with her hands on her hips.

"But-!"

"He's just visiting with the tourists, it's not like he's gonna stay," Wendy insists.

Stan gives Dipper a meaningful look before he walks away. He _definitely_ doesn't trust this boy. He can smell the difference from a one dollar bill and a hundred dollar bill form a mile away and that boy had only a few ones and a bunch of hundreds underneath. He at least wants Dipper to spy on them to make sure Mabel doesn't get caught up in anything supernatural, paranormal, or illegal (other than working at his shop).

While he also thinks about how concerned he is for his great niece he can't help, but get a little angry at Wendy for making so valid of an argument that he can't run off the boy- whatever his name may be- and keep his girl safe.

 _Can't exactly fire her... her dad's way to big for that,_ Stan internally grumbles to himself as he tries to get as much money from the customers as possible. Despite that he sees the girl as a daughter of some of the time and right then he had the explicit urge to ground her, but he knows that it is not his place to do so, but if he were to mention her running off when she thought he wasn't paying attention to her father she's sure that he can get that done. _No, save that for a rainy day._

Meanwhile Cupid was lying around bored. There was no one that he particularly thought should fall in love today. Maybe another day or the actual day of Valentine's Day, but he did want to have some fun. He looks around and thinks about multiple things that he can do to make some sort of entertainment for himself. Then he notices two people having a mild altercation in Gravity Falls- one of them he has _definitely_ met before.

 _Oh, this will be perfect,_ he thinks as he aims his arrows and fires. One arrow hits one of the targets, but the other is thrown off course when some kid throw a rock and it lands in one that _definitely_ isn't a target.

He winces and glances around. "Oops... I hope this turns out good..."

* * *

" _Ouch!_ "

 _Please don't be injured,_ he thinks, not wanting to pay for an employee being out and not working. "Are you alright?"

Wendy lifts up her eyes and when she looks at him she looks like she's seen the sun for the first time. He takes a surprised step back as his memory tingles. He's seen this look before, but it's been so long ago that he's not entirely sure which instance he saw it in.

"Awww, you're so caring," she says, smiling flirtatiously as she steps forward.

He frowns and takes another step back. "Did you eat something bad or something? Do I need to give you the day off?"

 _So you can stop looking at me like that?_ He thinks.

"Oh, don't play hard to get! Come here!"

And this is where he's glad that he kept up with his boxing a little. He lifts his hand up and covers her face with it and shoves her away so as not to make her fall back, but more as to keep her at a distance form himself. He glances around for something that he can use to keep her in place, but in that time she's hugged him and he instinctively pulls his hands back and holds them up to give her the signal that he doesn't like hugging.

"Please get off of me," he begs.

"But, I love you!"

He shoves her off immediately. "Okay, you obviously hit your head and you can't see me at all."

"I can see just fine Stanford-"

"That's Mr. Pines to you!" he corrects.

"Oh, so formal. It's-"

"No, no, no, no. _No!_ " He says, backing away and holding his hands out to keep her away.

"But, Mr. Pines," she says flirtatiously. "At least give a girl a chance."

"N-" Stan doesn't even have time to finish the word before she take the opportunity to steal a kiss from him, which he immediately breaks. "What in the _world_ has gotten into you?!"

"I know what I-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence, young lady!"

"Oh, so feisty!"

"D-did..." Stan looks over at Dipper for a moment and finds him staring at the both of them for a long moment before he gets red with anger. "Grunkle Stan, what'd you _do_ to her?!"

"I didn't do anything to her! One second she was doing work, the next she got hurt and I asked what was wrong and the next thing I know she's molesting me!" He says and when she gropes him he jumps away and glares at her. "Stop that!"

 _If this keeps up, so help me, there's gonna be a lot of extra money for actual food from now on!_

As Stan grabs the broom and tries to shove the teenager away from him Dipper observes Wendy. She's acting _completely_ different from normal and he doesn't know exactly why.

 _Maybe the Journal has something about it?_

"Wait... Is Mabel alone with that guy?!"

"They're in the living room, I came here to get permission to make popcorn for a movie."

Stan- for a moment- forgets about his struggle with the hormonal teenager. "You were supposed to _stay with her!_ "

He nearly curses when he enters the living room to find it vacant, but he quickly grabs his keys to the golf cart (so he could see a trail), baseball bat, and his gloves just in case. "C'mon, we've gotta go get your sister. Wendy, stay here and watch the shop."

"I'd rather watch you. You're really cute when you're overprotective," she sighs.

He blinks. "I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that."

With that said he leaves her to get his niece from the boy and whoever else could be there. He follows the footsteps and clenches the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles are whiter than untouched paper in an unopened journal. He can' believe this girl would be so stupid as to go off with a boy she literally just met- no- he could believe it, he just wanted to think that she learned better during her time with him in Gravity Falls.

 _If he lays a finger on my baby girl..._ He thinks with his mind going down a long, dark road filled with crimson. He's sure that Dipper is beating himself up about it in the passenger's seat and is thinking something along the same lines as his grunkle. Forget Wendy for a moment- she's okay since Soos is in the Shack with her- this is an immediate threat.

"I think I hear something!" Dipper says and the cart screeches to a halt.

The both of them listen carefully and hear whispering.

"C'mon Mabel, just a little farther."

"Okay, Pete," she says with a tone similar to that of Wendy.

 _What the heck is going on?_ Both Pines think as they exchange a look of concern and worry.

The two of them leave the cart there, Dipper mentally making note of where they are while Stan uses his pocket knife to make a mark on one of the trees they run by (luckily he never leaves the house without it).

The two stumble to a stop to assess the situation when they hear new voices.

"I see you did well on your end of the bargain. I guess we'll have to pay you for her." A man's voice by the sound of it. He sounded like he didn't want to pay for her and just take her.

Mabel seems to pay no mind to the fact that she's about to be sold because she clings to the boy- Pete- with a dreamy smile.

"That'd be nice," Pete snaps.

 _No one sells my niece/sister!_

Both Pines charge in with blind rage. Dipper gets Pete- probably for the best because Stan would have more than likely killed him- while Stan puts on his gloves and beats the five adults with his bat with as much strength as he can put into his body. Rage seems to make him a bit stronger than he would've been if he weren't so angry at the lack of humanity these men have. He can't understand how they could take a girl from her home and sell her without remorse.

"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Stan, stop!"

Said man blinks and looks at the bloodied and unconscious man he had been beating with his bat- the one that wanted to just steal Mabel. Stan looks up at his niece and nephew and finds that the both of them are staring at him in horror.

Stanford Pines can count on one hand how many times he's completely lost his mind to rage and nearly killed people and one of them had landed him in jail because he killed a man. Luckily he was released because of the fact that he only did it to protect his nephew from a pedophile when the boy was three (yes, those types of monsters- despite the other ones that pop up in Gravity Falls- are some of the worst and deserve to die). Two other times the people on the receiving end ended up in the hospital. Needless to say despite how hotheaded he can be, he has a great hold of his temper and doesn't "snap" often, but he's not perfect.

He'd never snapped in front of a child. His nephew was grabbed by his mother and taken out before any damage could be done. Mabel and Dipper were stuck watching him attack in blind rage with no remorse or mercy and more than likely an animalistic fire in his eyes that they've never seen before.

He looks down at his suit and finds a few crimson drops like he'd spilled a few drops of red Kool-Aid on his white shirt. He doesn't have much blood on him, but enough for evidence if anyone were to discover the bodies and more than likely lead him towards imprisonment (again) and these two being sent back to their parents- though now that he thinks about it, it's probably for the best.

With a sigh he looks down and away from them. "I'm sorry you had to see me like this."

He leads them back to the golf cart and drives back to the Mystery Shack with an overbearing silence. He knows that they are still processing what they've just witnessed and doesn't say anything because there is nothing to say.

After everything that's happened he's forgotten the problem he left at the Mystery Shack.

Wendy flies forward and throws her arms around Stanford. "Hey, Stan! I missed you!" He pushes her away and she frowns. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," he grumbles, walking into the Shack.

Several minutes of cleaning up and having the adrenaline leave his system he finds that he's gotten more injuries than he thought before. His bottom lip is cut, collarbone bruised, and right knee in a world of pain. After changing he grabs his cane and decides to use this for support until he heals a little bit. It was worth it to save Mabel, he decides.

He closed the store early and had to have Soos carry Wendy home because she was trying to molest Stan again. He won't be surprised to see her father coming around and demanding to know what Stan has done to his daughter the next day- or even tonight.

Right now he's wallowing in guilt for completely losing his mind in front of the kids. It would probably be best to send them home now so they wouldn't be afraid to go to sleep or something. That sounds to be the best plan of action.

"Grunkle Stan?"

He looks up to find Dipper standing in his doorway with Mabel hiding behind him.

 _Great, they really are afraid of me._

"What happened? I-in the forest?" Mabel asks.

He closes his eyes and sighs. "I lost it..."

"Your eyes were blood red," Dipper insists.

"Well, yeah. Veins tend to get more blood in them when angry," he says.

"Not the white of your eyes... the iris. They weren't brown," Dipper corrects.

Stan frowns- having never heard of that before, but then again none of the people that caused him to snap had been coherent enough to tell. "What're you talking about?"

Dipper shares a look with his sister. "You mean... you don't know?'

"Listen, kid, unless I look in a mirror I can't see my own eyes and as far as I know they don't turn red."

"Are you supernatural?"

 _This again._ "No. I was just..."

 _How to put this delicately._

"Okay, forget that... what made you "lost it" like that?"

With a sigh Stan starts to try and sift through his muddled thoughts. "I've only ever... _snapped_ a handful of times and it usually involves someone hurting my family and some display of lack of humanity and decency. When I heard that they were gonna sell Mabel like some groceries I... I couldn't control myself. I wouldn't be surprised if they were dead..." He notices their mortified looks and shakes his head. "I'll be sending you two back home, probably."

"No!" Mabel shouts, throwing herself into the man and wrapping her arms around his neck. "I don't wanna go..."

He blinks in surprise. "But I thought that after seeing me like that you'd-"

"What makes you think that? You're our Grunkle and you were only doing it because you love us," Dipper says with a shrug.

He smiles and opens his arms so that Dipper can get in on the hug and then he gives them a huge hug. "Thank you... You both mean the world to me and I can't... if anything happened to either of you, I don't know what I'd do."

The thought of either of them being taken away from him and sold or worse comes to mind and he hugs them tighter in hopes of assuring himself nothing will happen. After several minutes of this he composes himself and lets go of them. The two of them manage to get a glance to confirm he had been crying before he takes off his glasses and cleans himself up.

 _Geez, this kids are making me soft,_ he thinks as he leans back. "Alright, that's enough soft moments to last a lifetime. Let's get some sleep." He picks them up and starts for the door when he hears Dipper let out a reluctant noise. "Huh? What is it?"

"We were- uh..." He gives a glance to his sister for help.

"Wondering if we could sleep in here with you tonight..." Mabel finishes.

He contemplates this. _It's only for one night._ "Alright, I guess. Go get into your pajamas real fast."

They run off to do jet that and he gets into his own: a pair of shorts and his wife beater shirt. When the two come back he's already underneath the covers half-way unconscious. The two of them get on either side of him and cuddle up to his sides and this lasts for all of two seconds before Mabel climbs onto his chest and curls up like a kitten and falls asleep. He chuckles silently and gets comfortable with his nephew cuddled up into his side and his niece curled up on his chest.

 _Why do I feel like I'm forgetting something? Eh, it doesn't matter,_ he thinks with one last yawn before he goes to sleep.

 _Epilogue(ish):_

Wendy shakes from Stan-deprevation and giggles madly. "Stan! I still love you!"

Suddenly she's knocked out and the invisible arrow is taken out of her rear end.

"Never doing a double arrow here again," Cupid says before he flies away, leaving an unconscious Wendy in front of the Shack.

* * *

HAT: Firstly, Valentine's Dae Day sounds ghetto to me, but I decided to go with it anyway. Also, in my mind it was Mabel that was the accident and it was aimed for Stan, but after writing that last part I'm questioning that... Hmmm...

Soos: That's kinda dark, dude.

HAT: *shrugs* I used to write mildly dark things and a bunch of humor... now not so much.

Soos: Life is filled with darkness, but it is relief when one finds the light.

HAT: You're a great character, Soos, but I can't hang out with you so much anymore...

Soos: It's both a blessing and a curse to be amazing as me.

HAT: *rolls eyes* Okay... **Anyway, I'm thinking about making an alternate version of this that's actually full of humor. Review and let me know if you want that or not.**

Soos: What was the purpose of me being here if you were going to tell them to review anyway? What am I, just eye candy for these people to get them to review?!

HAT: ... yes.

Soos: *bows head* I accept this task. *takes off shirt* Stare at me- you're candy!

HAT: Put your shirt back on! This isn't a strip club! *groans and shakes head* I can't anymore...


End file.
